sometimes i wonder, why am i trying so hard on slimming down/diet/etc
am i doing it for someone else? or am i doing it for my own good?
i have no idea.. there are times that i wonder, what do i really want?
do i have a fix goal? do i enjoy what i have now?
i really don't know.

even my own brother said i don't really show much effort or whatever if i want something.
well true.. i refuse to keep bugging/asking of something if you said NO.
to me, NO means NO. no point trying so hard to keep bugging/asking for it.
its just ANNOYING, i don't like it... whatever i don't like.. i won't do it on others
and i guess he don't understand the point of it.

what is the point of doing that? i really don't know.
yeah there are stuff i really want -_-'
but if you give me NO for an answer, i'll try my best not to bring up the subject.

then i'll start saving money to buy it or something ~ -sigh-
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i enjoy the accompany of my family and friends,sometimes i do enjoy being alone.
but sometimes i feel down for no reason
and i'll always read yaoi manga or something to cheer myself up.

i enjoy reading romance manga and sometimes i'm kinda jealous of the female character.
i did wish i have a life like them or something.
-sigh- i have no confident in myself, cause ~
i'm scared that i can fall in love and fall out of love in a very short period of time.
since i always get bored easily -_-''

everyday i rant so much on my blog ~
growing up is hard and troublesome ಠ_ಠ ..
parent's expectation is another problem. -sigh-
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sometimes i wish i could stop doubting myself ~
but that seems almost impossible.

-sigh- tml back to school ~ time flies...
about 1 month ++ more to holidays !
3 sept !! faster come ): ! i'm dying... -_-"

never mind ~ i shall continue watching Panty & Stocking